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	<title>Spreading the love around &#187; listen</title>
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	<description>Lina Ru</description>
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		<title>What to do when depressed?</title>
		<link>http://linaru.projectlove.me/what-to-do-when-depressed/</link>
		<comments>http://linaru.projectlove.me/what-to-do-when-depressed/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 14 Jan 2009 07:50:57 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lina Ru </dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Questioning Guide]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[What?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[anger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[awareness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[depression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[frustration]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[listen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://linaru.projectlove.me/?p=184</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Depression is a complex situation because it integrates many aspects, for example: if I feel anger, it is because I feel powerless, thus frustrated that you cannot change "the thing that keeps you depressed".  Or, If I are am an egoist person, then others will start to stay away from me because I am bitter, self-centered, and I will become lonely although surrounded of people. ]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>You need to listen to your thoughts&#8230; Why could this be so important? We don&#8217;t realize the significance of listening. It first starts with yourself, and then it begins to extend to your surroundings.</p>
<blockquote><p>Thoughts create depression. Is this true?</p></blockquote>
<p><strong>Stay alert:</strong></p>
<ul class="arrows">
<li> Do you speak only about yourself?</li>
<li> Do you ask for others doings after speaking a while about yourself?</li>
<li> Do you really pay attention to the meaning of the words when they are speaking or are you just thinking in what are you about to respond?</li>
<li> Do you analyze the impact of your words and calculate the &#8220;aftermath&#8221; of your encounter?</li>
</ul>
<p>Sometimes, we rather talk to someone without a purpose, than to listen to yourself before, during, and after speaking. Why?</p>
<div class="captionleft"><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/83792365@N00/1414298839"><img src="http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1093/1414298839_af03f08b06.jpg" border="0" alt="No Tolerance (134/365)" hspace="5" /></a>by <a title="Link to Icky Pic's photostream" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/ickypic/"><strong>Icky Pic</strong></a></div>
<p>If you don&#8217;t listen to yourself, you are actually a representation of this picture: Totally blind to your surroundings, and totally confused with what is going on because you are not observing/listening/talking about what is happening.</p>
<p>If you talk about yourself without considering what the other person may want to hear, are you actually communicating? You may say; you do, but in fact a conversation can only be held if two persons are really engaged into understanding each other. </p>
<p>For example: You may talk for half an hour about fish because you love them, but after that you go to sleep, and don&#8217;t ask your mate (wife, husband, friend, brother, sister etc.) about his day, his plants, or whatever. Do you realize that by doing so, you are separating from him?</p>
<p>Now, it can be tough because even you do have the intention of listening, you may realize that now you can see things that may hurt:</p>
<p class="blocknumber"><span class="bignumber">01</span>You were so into speaking that you hadn&#8217;t read their body talk before (yawn, a tick, touching their mouth as if they want to speak, etc.); you realize people weren&#8217;t interested in your talk.</p>
<p class="blocknumber"><span class="bignumber">02</span>Those who listened to you, don&#8217;t want to talk to you about the things they love, and don&#8217;t feel the need to share about themselves.</p>
<p class="blocknumber"><span class="bignumber">03</span>You may realize the interesting things you could have known, you may regret the days you were self centered, and wished had spent sharing with your loved ones. You may even feel sad for being so dumb.</p>
<p class="alert"><strong>Now, stop.</strong><br />
If you start feeling those depressive thoughts, react! There is no need to feel guilt, but to analyze the reasons behind the self-centered attitudes, so you may be alert before they arise again.</p>
<p>Your old patterns will try to regain force, each day, until the new habits replace the old ones. Well, how does all of this relate to depression?  Well, a sad person comes into being because of several factors like:</p>
<ul class="checklist">
<li> Loneliness</li>
<li> Fear</li>
<li> Anger</li>
<li> Frustration</li>
<li> Insecurity</li>
<li> Low-self esteem</li>
<li> Egoism</li>
</ul>
<p>One concept is always are related to each other. For example: If I feel anger, it is because I feel powerless, thus frustrated that you cannot change &#8220;the thing that keeps you depressed&#8221;.  Or, If I are am an egoist person, then others will start to stay away from me because I am bitter, self-centered, and I will become lonely although surrounded of people. </p>
<p class="stickynote">So, what can we do when depressed? Find out the source of the depression. Listen to your thoughts. Find out if your thoughts provoke your sadness. Find the reason of those thoughts. Ask questions, ask them again, and release the inner pain through becoming aware of it. </p>
<p>Good Luck!<br />
By the way, <strong>beware</strong>: These ideas are not considering a chemical imbalance, merely &#8220;mind/spirit&#8221; issues.</p>
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		<item>
		<title>How does perception affect my thoughts?</title>
		<link>http://linaru.projectlove.me/how-does-perception-affect-my-thoughts/</link>
		<comments>http://linaru.projectlove.me/how-does-perception-affect-my-thoughts/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 03 Dec 2008 21:36:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Lina Ru </dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[How?]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[My Mind Guide]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Questioning Guide]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Theories]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[listen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mind control]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[thought]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tricks]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://linaru.projectlove.me/?p=161</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Do the voices inside my head control me or do I control the voices? Those voices are conditioned by my past experiences. I see a tree. I know it is a tree because someone told me it was so. I am not focusing. I believe there is a man standing beside it, but I focus and no one is there.

Was it my mind or my senses?]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p align="justify">I am sitting at a porch looking at cars. They come and go, so do my <a title="thoughts" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thought">thoughts</a>. I can gaze for long hours listening to the voices in my head.</p>
<p>Do the voices control me or do I control the voices?</p>
<p class="tips">Those voices are conditioned by my past experiences. I see a tree. I know it is a tree because someone told me it was so. I am not focusing. I believe there is a man standing beside it, but I focus and no one is there.</p>
<p><strong>Was it my mind or my senses?</strong></p>
<div class="captionleft"><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/90963248@N00/2220611397"><img style="border: 0pt none;margin-left: 5px;margin-right: 5px" src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2128/2220611397_73b6486fe9.jpg" border="0" alt="I think..." hspace="5" width="375" height="500" /></a>Flickr: Vince Alongi</div>
<p>This event tells me the mind is not trustworthy. My senses can trick me and my mind can create whatever it wishes. (Example: Schizophrenia)</p>
<p>Is there a way to discover what is real without other people as my point of reference?</p>
<p>There must because we will die, and alone. So, other <a title="people’s opinions or ideas" href="http://linaru.projectlove.me/how-much-will-we-let-society-affect-our-lives/">people’s opinions or ideas</a> are not valid at the time of death.</p>
<p>So, if certainty does not come from external interactions, but from inside out. How can I discover it?</p>
<p align="justify"><a href="http://linaru.projectlove.me/how-do-thoughts-influence-my-life/">Let’s explore this with our thoughts&#8230; </a></p>
<blockquote><p>The fact: Thoughts are influenced by our surroundings, if we are not aware of those thoughts and how our surroundings affect them&#8230; we may end up doing things we are not passionate and happy with.</p></blockquote>
<p>Thoughts play a very important role, but sometimes we underestimate their power. We take a thought as a reality or a fact, when a thought is one of the most ephimeral things of this world.</p>
<p class="stickynote"><strong>For example:</strong><br />
I see a man with big wrist watch. I want it. I see a TV ad. I want it even more.<br />
<strong>If I ask my self:</strong> Why do I want it? Do I need it? Can I use that money for something even better?<br />
<strong>Answer:</strong> I don&#8217;t need it. I prefer&#8230; or I want it because&#8230;<br />
<em>You just stopped to think, therefore your free will is in action. </em><br />
<strong>On the other hand:</strong> if you did not question yourself, and just bought it&#8230; You are just a muppet of our surroundings.<br />
Think about it.</p>
<p>While I believe the media is not the one to blame, but each one of us, who don&#8217;t question things and go with the flow. If we all began asking the reasons  behind everything&#8230; this world would be very different; more peaceful and educated.</p>
<p>The media is the result of our actions, and it is the reflection of the mayority of our society. Don&#8217;t blame the media. Question your mind, and find out: Am I being controled by someone? Or am I being free and those are my elections?</p>
<p><strong>Why?</strong></p>
<p>Each one of us, choose how and what to absorve in the media, if we are aware of our surroundings as they unfold. It is very easy to just blame others for the way and how we are being manipulated.</p>
<p style="text-align: left">However, it is a point of view I find somewhat interesting:</p>
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